A little visit to my grandma's heart

I was just wondering what to write for my LA blog when my grandma tapped me on my shoulders.

My porpor was eighty-eight years old, same as our minister mentor Lee Kuan Yew. She was definitely ancient looking with her unkempt frizzly looking white hair and her wrinkles creased with age. Her eyes bore into my eyes through her thick, round and huge lens. Her face was a mixture of emotions. Regret, sorrow or maybe even relief? I do not know. But what I do know is that I will find that out in whatever she is going to tell me within the next few minutes.

Her lips cracked into a smile as she told me the good news. She is going to leave 2000 dollars for each of us (my three siblings and I) for university. Pang gugu (means fat aunt, what we called her from young) is going to withdraw the money from the bank after she passed away. She beamed one of those smiles, one that would appeared on a kid when he have something important to declare, as she revealed that the money was what my grandpa left for her when he passed away. The money would be for us to buy food in university, she says, so that we would not go hungry while we are studying. She hastily added on that she was telling me now because in a few months time, my eldest brother, Zhi Hua, and my sister, Hui Min, would be going university and she would be handing the money to them. She was afraid that my 2nd brother, Zhi Qin and I would be jealous over the sum of money and create a fuss out of it. Rest assure, she says, I am leaving each of you the same amount. With this she placed her right hand upon her heart, her left left caressing my head and said

"I love you all the same. All four of you."

Then she laughed and goes on telling me how lucky she was to have four grandchildren. Suddenly she sits up with her back straight, her eyebrows narrowed and said

"Zhi Qin is the real nasty one. I bet you don't know this. When I asked him to help me do simple things like switching off the fan or finding something, he will fly into a rage and act like he is going to hurt me. Really. He is the nasty one."

The fact that I know that Zhi Qin sometimes bully porpor makes me cringed with guilt. I was not able to stop that at all. The only thing I could do was to respect her and listen to her. I do not have control over how my siblings behaved towards her, do I? I tried, yes I did, to stop them from throwing a tantrum towards porpor. She is just an old lady, I say, there is no need to be angry over her. But they do not heed my words at all. When porpor take nearly half the plate of the char siew, leaving very little for the family, my 2nd brother and sister would yelled at her. I said just let her have her fill but they were not appeased at all. What could I do?

"...sometimes your sister also. She would ignore me when I asked her questions or shout at me to not ask so many questions."

She paused and added,

"You and Zhi Hua are more polite and patient towards me. But both of you are away most of the time, him in the army and you living in the school."

Up to here in case you misunderstands, my sister and 2nd brother are no tyrants. They were simply more hot-tempered. I remember when we were young, both of them sleeps in one room with porpor. They grew up with her. Maybe that's why they were sick of her and her flaws. My porpor is no angel herself. Her antics sometimes really grates our nerves. When she eats, some food would drop to the floor. Or she would leave the skin of the fruits she ate on the windowsill. I am sure she don't really mean what she says. The one about Zhi Qin being the nasty one. In fact, she dotes on Zhi Qin more than anyone when we were young. She would rub Zhi Qin's tummy with those medical oil whenever Zhi Qin felt unwell or have constipation. Zhi Qin was also the one who carry out every errands for her. He would buy the medical oil she always use when they were finished. Maybe that is why when Zhi Qin grew up and stop listening to her, she felt hurt. I am sure she still loves him a lot.

"Did you eat properly in the school?" ( I think she meant boarding school)

I said I did and she would reply as per normal,

"That is good. Eating is good. Porpor is very scared you all would go hungry. You all look so skinny, especially you. I was afraid you did not eat well in school. Eating is good. When I give you the money for university then you could spend the money and eat more. I am scared when I die my grandchildren will go hungry."

She goes on telling me the importance of studying in school. So when we grow up, we would get a good job, we would have sufficient salary so that we will not go hungry. She goes on telling me about the money from grandpa.

"When I die, the money left would be split to everyone: papa, mama, da gugu (big/eldest aunt), pang gugu and all four of you. Its not much, the money for you in the university. But that is what I can do for all of you. Other porpor may not do that you know."

She said that with pride. She should be proud.

There was not much she could do for us. She was denied of chores since we were afraid that she might hurt herself or tire herself. we kept quiet about all kinds of problems so that she need not worry. In her perspective, she probably felt that her existence was insignificant. But with the money, she still could at least prevent her grandchildren from going hungry. So, she should be proud. I am proud of her love for us too.

She wondered about if Zhi Hua has eaten well in the army too. But she quickly continues to say,

"Zhi Hua is going to come out of army soon. Then he will go university."

Once again, I cringed with guilt. She has no idea that Zhi Hua flunked his A levels. He might not be able to university at all. Most likely not. However, he is retaking A levels this year along with my sister. My parents are concerned over this since he spent 700 dollars to retake but he was not putting in efforts to study. Anyway, I shall not digress. That is completely another issue. I decided that there is no point telling porpor about this. Since that would only make her sadder.

Probably noticing that I was thinking of something else, she starts to talk about the past. The past where she used to live with everyone in the kampong. And she knows everyone in the kampong. I took this chance to confirm with her how my father met my mother. I got my parent's version already but this is a rare chance to know more.

"One day, don't know where was it already, I told my friend who was your mother's aunt, that my son has no girlfriend. My friend said her brother have a nice girl so I told your father and he called your mother that night."

She paused for a while, maybe more than a while. Seems to be considering something. Then she said,

"Your mama is a nice woman. She really is."

I always felt that my mother was not very close to porpor but it seems like my porpor and my mother both were very alike. Both were unable to show their affection for each other. My mother always asked my siblings or me to offer the nice food to my porpor when she could very well do it herself. Guess that is just the way how daughter-in-laws and mother-in-laws behaved.

"Your papa is also a rare species himself. A man who do not smoke or gamble. He can cook, sew, fix household appliances and take care of all four of you. And he is very filial to me."

She laughs when she said that wherever my father goes, he would boast that nobody can beat her cooking skills. That is just what kind of a person your father is, she says.

After hearing her, I cringed with guilt and embarrassment (for the 3rd time?!). I am not a bad son but I am not a saint too. I realized that so much have change since I was young.

When I was young, I would climb onto my parents bed to hug and kiss them goodnight. (though I still do them but less often, especially I am in boarding school now)

When I was young, I would jump at any chance to help my mother cook. Although she only let me wash the vegetables or beat the eggs. Sometimes she would let me cook for a few seconds then she would take over lest the food overcooked. (that was when I was very young)

When I was young, I would answer "aye!" when my porpor calls out "Ah zhi yong ahhhh" (that was also when I was very young)

Now that I grown up, instead of showing more respect to my parents, I became more rebellious. I stopped listening to everything they said. I began to censor information that would cause me to face a scolding.

My porpor must have seen me stare into space while I recalled the past and decided that she talked enough for the day. She told me to continue doing my work on my computer and declared that she is going to have an afternoon nap.

Maybe its time I heard enough too. For if I hear anything more, I might have let my tears out in embarrassment, guilt and nostalgia.

P.S. The following conversation is translated to English but the original meaning is 99% retained.

Responsibilty

It happened quite some time ago, just about a week before the Project Finals. My group (Tzehou, Jiajie and Daniel) and I went to a tuition centre to introduce our project about Peranakan as part of our resource package (Cat 7) . The tuition centre were located at the top floor of Causeway Point and it was our second time there.

We were called in to the office where I think the lady we met in there was the in-charge of the tuition centre. She showed us our email to the tuition centre with several highlighted points in it. The time the email was received was at Monday 12am++. I was rather appalled by the fact since I thought that the email was sent days ago. (that day was Tuesday)The in-charge seemed very displeased at the fact that we showed no consideration to the tuition centre at all. She lamented that we should sent the email 3 days earlier. Tze Hou was apologetic since he was the one who sent the email. Whoever, the in-charge carried on by saying that Tze Hou's mother has contacted the tuition centre and requested for a slot in the schedule. At this point of the conversation, the whole group was utterly shocked as it was not known to anyone of us. (including Tze Hou) It seemed that Tze Hou's mother has act without informing him. In the end we get a lecture from her about our irresponsibility and other faults such as sending an email without leaving the contact number.

I felt that we should really be thoroughly ashamed of ourselves as both of the in-charge's sons were from Hwa Chong and we agreed that this should not be how students from a prestigious school should behave. We have learnt several lessons through this minor setback and I realized that sometimes we learnt more outside the school itself. Responsibility proved to be an extremely important attribute in co-operation with people of different walks of life. It is certainly something we cannot live without in our life.

Random-ness

I have really neglected this seemingly sleepy blog of mine. Its always like this. Its hard to have one life but two blogs. Sometimes you just simply don't feel like writing on 1 blog if you have 2 blogs... Its weird. If I got the time, I will figure out someday. Now lets get on to my real topic today. Hehheh. Its kinda strange in my recent blog posts that my posts seem to lack a very important quality that blogs should have. And that is the "just-in-the-day" events and feelings. Most posts would be a reflection of a story-telling of what happen that day but mine was rather different. It seemed to either lag a while or simply just random thoughts and feelings evoked by certain chains of events. Its liked a chemical reaction. Blah + Bleh + TIME --> Blog post!

I don't know about readers of this blog. But I certainly feel that there is no consistent style of writing here and it just seem to change in a very rapid pace. The style (not sure if the 'style' I am talking about here is the same 'style' Miss Lim talks about in narrative lessons) varys according to the mood I am in on that day. It could be reflective, humorous (rare) or simply events' show-and-tell. See, I am digressing here. If you are very confused here, read the next blog post which will most likely happen today. That is my main topic. But digression is inevitable today in "My Blah-Blog". I seem to be in a very twitchy mood. Nevermind that. It is kinda personal and if I go into that, it will be another big big digression.

:)

Laptop's keyboard are really easy to type. While thinking about how to start on the main topic, I managed to type 2 paragraghs in like WOW! a few minutes. (or what it feels like) Now that I really *screwed* this blog post up, I decided to just put a stop to it and start on the task, which is to blog a post, to liven up this blog.

Win-Win

Its another one of my family's post-dinner talk and my father shared with us one story which I thought was rather meaningful and was very related to Hwa Chong's philosophy "win-win". The story starts with a young man asking a wise old man what is the difference between hell and heaven. The wise old man said, "Hell and Heaven both have unlimited delicacies. But there is one peculiar rule in Hell and Heaven - diners must use a four feet fork to eat. Spirits who went to Heaven survive. On the other hand, the spirits who went to Hell died." *Its illogical as spirits can't die...*

The young man was curious and asked for a reason. The wise old said, "Spirits who went to Hell cannot use the four feet forks. The forks were too long. However, the spirits who went to Heaven did not use the forks to feed themselves. They use the forks to feed others and others feed them with their fork." I thought this story was rather interesting. Astonishing, my father told me its an economic anecdote. Its purpose is to tell the entrepreneurs that feedbacks are very important. I interpreted the story my own way and thought that its about win-win situation.

I personally feel that helping each other out is extremely important in modern hectic lifestyle. If we ever think of doing everything ourselves without anybody's help, regardless its family, friends or colleagues, I think our life will be a very stressful one. Needing someone's help does not mean showing weaknesses on your part. When I was in primary school, I used to refuse help on some unimportant stuff. I did not know the reason why but now, I think maybe I thought that but asking for assistance in some minor stuff,I am showing that I am incapable.

It also reminded me of the Adam Khoo course "Take Flight" in Primary 6. On one of the activities, we were grouped into pairs and were supposed to play Tic-Tac-Toe. Each groups were given two Tic-Tac-Toe template. The winner of all groups is to let both your partner and yourself to win as much as possible. I did what I thought was right and went to cross out every box. My partner which is also my best friend eyed me with suspicion and surprise but I reckoned he trusted me so he did not object to my actions. In the end, we were the only group who won and we surprised the trainers completely with the answer to the "riddle". That's definitely one nice memory! Maybe, I am fated to come Hwa Chong! *Not considering the fact that I have not heard of Hwa Chong when I was P6.*

:)

Change

I came across this quote through another blog which my 2nd brother recommended as an inspiration. I thought it was rather meaningful since I reflected upon myself when I was doing this particular Malay assignment which needed a family photo. It struck upon me how much I have changed in these few years.

Especially during the times in Hwa Chong.

Inevitably, negative changes were bound to occur on this 'vulnerable' period of time when impressions, malevolent or benevolent, were most likely be implanted, perhaps for lifetime, in this teen behind the screen now. I don't deny that I learnt more swear words now. I don't deny that I was expose to more sex-related terms. And I don't deny that I have learnt to manipulated truth now. HOWEVER, that does not certainly mean I have been using my new-founded vocabulary. In fact, I prided myself for being one of the class members who did not use the F word. :D

With puberty at work, maybe I tend to view stuff with a bit more seriousness. I take people's words to heart, I take note how people look at me, I tried to present myself in a cool, neat manner. Constantly struggling to portray myself as a flawless character in other people lives and more important in my own life. Sometimes changes makes you wonder if you are still yourself or you are changing to become your real self. Or perhaps, you are just someone who perpetually trying to change for the sake of changing. Change is the only constant. But the constant seemed to make me inconsistent in my thoughts and emotions.

Its nostalgic as I recalled how innocent and pure I was in my primary school times. Ignorance is bliss. Indeed it is. Looking at my own picture years ago, when I was a lot shorter, much more plump, with hair 1 cm long and face rounder and smaller, I could not help but wish I can experience the life I used to experience back then. Answering questions without thinking and still could be deemed as adorable. Getting scolded by teachers and still could be just as happy the next day. The carefree and innocence of me then was like a balloon floating up to the sky. You cannot get it back. But you still like to watch it drift slowly up to the blue, blue sky. Remembering the times when you once have it in your hands.

We are coming to the end of Term 1 soon and I must say that Term 1 was a very hectic period of time with my competition. If I do not know myself well, I would be saying I am giving excuses... The competitions indeed occupied a large space in my time. Not that I could actually get away with this reason alone. It all boils down to my inability to manage my time well. I got to prioritise and make sure I have adequate practice on every subjects!

I must admit that I have indeed disappoint numerous teachers with my scores this term, especially my inconsistency in my Language Arts. Miss Lim, if you are reading this I must apologise for my inconsistency. However, Miss Roselind Matthews once said to me, "Do not say sorry to me. I am just doing what I should be doing. Learn from your mistakes and get over with it." I still remember that it was the time when I got very low for my history test and Miss Matthews brought up my marks by being a little lenient. From then on, I look upon Miss Matthews in a different light, not because of her help but because of her wisdom that I felt from her. Therefore, I will work harder next term which I believed that my compeitions will end by that time and I would have no more excuses anymore :)

How ironic. Most of the adults would be glad to be a child once again, unburdened by the responsibility of the society. On the other hand, most of the children would want to grow up faster instead, to experience the privileges of freedom. Is that really so? Is that only what we think? I do not know but I would like to believe that some of the adults would rather remained as an adult to enjoy the freedom he/she desire from young. I would also like to believe that some of the children would rather stay as a child, just happy to do only what he is suppose to.

What about me, you ask? Haha, I like myself to be special. From young, I was conditioned to stereotype that all the adults want to be carefree again and all the children want to escape from childhood. Hence, slowly but surely, I wanted to grow up faster. I wanted to be an adult. But, it was not to enjoy the so-called privileges of freedom, it was just to understand why adults wanted to be children and why children wanted to be adults. The carefree of children, the privilege of freedom, they were nothing but illusions. I have come to this age where people can consider us to be boys or gentlemen therefore I can say that I understand part of what it is to be an adult and what it is to be a child. I cannot consider myself to be carefree with the amount of pressure and workload I have. Of course, it cannot be compared to the stress an adult face but nontheless it was a negative force so strong and intangible that it holds you down as time passes. Yet the desire to experience freedom of adults were not quench.

However, I am fine with it. Simply because I feel that what both the adults and children wanted is the same. Privilege of freedom of the adults and being unburden and carefree like the children,is to break free from the chains of the absolute existence, life. In this society, whether you are a child or an adult, you got restrain but the rules of life. Children were bound by rules and regulations to protect us, despite the fact that we may not like the limitations. Adults, similarly, were weighed down by troubles of surviving, not only for themselves but for their families. They have a need to fret over little events that may bring changes to their lives or the lives of their loved ones. Therefore, they felt that its hard to take just a breather, thinking that such a short rest would bring a change to their routinal life, making their world upside-down.

The friend I want in TKAM

If I could choose, I would choose Jem. In a realistic manner, since we are both closer in age and same gender, we would get along well. (Stereotype-thinking) The reason why I chose Jem the moment I read the question is because I can empathise with him. This decision is greatly influenced by the trials during the later part of the novel. I was elated like him when I read that Tom Robinson's left arm was crippled. I thought that for once, despite nagging doubts, that Atticus would win the case. Raw shock gripped me when I read the part with 4 guilty together. I blanked out for a sudden. This may seem dramatic, but I did not know whether it was the long hours I spent on the book that made me thought that I read wrongly or I was simply rejecting the words on the book. I couldn't believe that he actually lost though it has to be like this in the novel to fully express the strong discrimination of the Whites to the Negros. I refused to believe it and read the page 217 three times, confirming the truth. I felt nothing but pity and unfairness for Tom Robinson. Just as the book stated, it just ain't right.

At that moment I really felt liked comforting Jem, telling him that he was not the only person feeling that the jury was blinded by prejudice. That was when I felt that Jem was rather similar to me in that aspect. Perhaps I would have wanted to be friends with Scout if she was portrayed as a little bit more matured. However, the purpose of Scout, Jem and Dill being in different ages was to show the different rates and stages of maturation in the three children and I thought that Jem's maturation stage was like mine since I could understand how he felt in the novel better than Dill or Scout. Hence, it would be rather nice to have a friend that feels the same way as you do. That's just what I thought.

My Research on the Mockingbirds.

According to my research on mockingbirds, they lived mostly at residential areas, city parks, farmlands, open country with thickets, and desert brush. They build their nests in dense shrubs and low trees. It is very similar to the setting of TKAM. The Cunninghams farmed to survive. Therefore, the environment in Maycomb, Alabama should be farmlands and open countries with thickets. Similarly, in the movie TKAM, we can see that there are low trees and shrubs could be seen near Atticus' house and where Dill appeared through the gate.

The Mockingbird is also the state bird of Arkansas, Florida, Mississippi, Tennessee, and Texas. As Mississippi is one of the state that was located near Alabama, Mockingbirds should be found in Maycomb.

Plant berry bushes such as holly, mulberries, raspberries, Virginia creeper, blackberries, dogwood, elderberries, hackberry, brambles, pyracantha, cotoneaster, grapes or figs would also be found in Maycomb as they were part of the diet of Mockingbirds and they were able to survive in Maycomb since they were shrubs.

Results of BGFL Quiz

It was pure astonishment to found out that I am naturalistic and intrapersonal. Regardless how many times I do these kind of personality quizzes, it never fails to surprise me. It have never come across my mind that I was naturalistic as I am not one who goes to a park or observes the environment regularly. My family has just got fishes before the new year in hopes to make my family more lively. Though this decision was greatly influence by my father, it does not hide the fact that I cared about the fishes. Perhaps doing this kind of quizzes simply exposed us to the other side of our personality, or rather, the real side of it.

Similarly, I always thought myself to be interpersonal instead of intrapersonal. Most of the time I do not know what I am thinking or how I should articulate my thoughts. Maybe thats why my inability to express made me more intrapersonal then interpersonal. I am not sure when, but it has come to the extend where I am deemed *emo* by my friends. I don't really mind because they would have known me better than I know myself.

My Birthday :)

It wasn't until Liyee messaged me on the bus to wish me Happy Birthday that I remembered that today's the big day. I wanted to reply with a 'Thx!' but my phone spoiled and I couldn't type out an exclamation mark... Anyway, thanks a lot Liyee! I am pretty touched that some of my friends still remembered my birthday. But among them, all were girls. (Majority of my good friends were girls in Primary School, in case you don't know.) What was more touching was that my classmates actually sang me birthday songs in class. Both Chinese and English. Haha. It was so embarrassing . Mr Sim was talking about lockers(?) and then Si Yuan suddenly shouted, "Today is Zhi Yong's birthday!" I was surprised that he knew/remembered. I am not really the type of person who always remember other people's birthday therefore I am really really touched beyond words to describe. I tried to act passive though. Its not like I wanted to laugh or cry in front of Mr Sim.

Back at home, My family and I ate steamboat for dinner. My eldest brother's girlfriend(?) was there too since my eldest brother will be leaving for NS tomorrow. How sad. My celebration also serves as a farewell party for him. :(
Fortunately, he will be coming back soon because of Chinese New Year. The house will be going to be so empty until Saturday. Sister go to Orientation Camp and eldest brother to NS.
I will have a very big bed since he is off to NS. (We shared our bed)

Haiz... Despite the birthday and NS thingy all going on, its a fact that tomorrow there will be a Math test and I will have to mug to pass...

The POWER of cheering. HCI Version.

I have not really thought much about Hwa Chong's cheers when I first entered Hwa Chong. During the SOO (Secondary One Orientation) I always ignore the "Group ** squeeze!" and the OT (Organizing Team)'s effort to foster the Hwa Chong spirit in us. I even came to the point of disliking the seniors when they forced us to repeat the cheers until we have learnt it, memorised it and until they were satisfied. To be frank, I was throughly disgusted by their actions. I still remembered the time when 2 OTs witnessed us doing a "weak Rock You" and then forced us to repeat it so many times until we were rather late for our break. At that time I was the top 1 introvert guy in my group. (though someone would pass me off as "acting cool" and "emo".) Therefore I wasnt doing the cheer properly at all. However, I was not caught, instead I went for my break with my group and that's it. I didn't understand the reason behind in learning the cheers. I didn't get to feel the real Hwa Chong spirit. I didn't used the chance to expressed my pride of being a Hwa Chong 子弟. But nothing is too late. I still have years to enjoy the bonds and spirit of Hwa Chongians. So now, I am going to share with you all an event that will be significant in my entire Hwa Chong life.

We were a bit early for our B Division match. So we settled down in Clementi Town Secondary School and watched the match that was before our B Div's. It was Hua Yi VS Bukit Panjang. It was a B Div match. That means it would be a nice one. However the real thrill in watching this match was that both teams were rather significant in relation to our B Div. Bukit Panjang was the only team that has won our B Div in this year's West Zone so far. And Hua Yi have just lost to our B Div recently. The first round was a rather plain victory for the Bukit Panjang but the second round was a very tight match. The scores were very close throughout. It could be possible that Hua Yi would win. That would be quite humiliating for our seniors as they won Hua Yi which won Pukit Panjang which won them. In other words, it could mean in some percentage that our B Div won Hua Yi because of luck or Bukit Panjang won our B Div because of luck. (Its rather confusing, isnt it?) My C Div captain, Hong Sen, said that he would jumped off the building if Hua Yi lost. It was rather extreme but he was a confident man. I too believed that Bukit Panjang was too stable and consistent for Hua Yi to win. I also have no doubt that if there is 1 team who could win our incredible B Div, it would not lose that easily. I was correct, in the end, Hua Yi lost.

Soon after, Mr Tok beckoned us to go outside while the B Div were warming up. The first question he asked was, "Why have you come today? To watch the match or to support the seniors?" Honestly, I was surprised. From the start, everybody has been saying, "We are going to see the match." Nobody said, "We are going to support the seniors." From the moment onwards, I kinda changed my purpose of coming here. It's not to watch, it's to support. Mr Tok continued by saying that this match would be extremely important as it was a match that would decide whether the B Div would be able to get champion. With that he entered the indoor sports. When we followed suit, the B Div already started warming up. The standard warming up sequence was personal team warming up, then free spike followed by serving. One could pictured it like an ancient war. My famous senior Zhengjie thundered down a ball with a "bpoom" and we followed up by cheering. The ball was just like the catapult and the cheering were millions of arrows fired. The opponent suffered morale damaged but their notorious Oliver smashed down a nearly-invisible ball that went "BPOOM!" So on and so forth.

The players down there were the catapults and the supporters up here were the archers. It isn't a real blood and flesh battle. It was a battle of morale. Even the best player would have fear deep in their heart when they saw that their strength was on par with the other.

The match started. It was long before it ends.
Clementi scored 1 point. Hwachong scored 2 point. Clementi scored 2. Hwachong scored 1 point. The differences in their scores never exceeded 3. It was a battle of equal strength. But we lost. It was solemn silence during the timeout before the 2nd match. The 2nd match started. The situation is similar. But, they did not have a value we practised. 自强不息。When the scores were nearing the twenties, HCI scores surged and won. For Clementi, it was probably a defeat of underestimating us since our morale seems low. The 3rd match was swift and thrilling enough. HCI took advantage of their sudden defeat and their scores skyrocketed. However, Clementi started to crawl back in pursue of us. And within a short amount of time, the difference of 10 points was reduced to only 3. It served as a tremendous blow for HCI but the supporters did not give up, neither did the players. We believed in our seniors' victory. We yelled our lungs out on every ball that was served till our voice was hoarse and coarse. In the end, we won. In spite of facing such a strong team. In spite of losing the first match. In spite of the sudden increase of scores for Clementi town in the third match. They won. We won. That really showed me the real POWER of cheering.

Importance of Common Language

In a flash, the September 1 week holidays have gone by. Let me recapped some things I have learnt and what I have done during this week of rest. Hmm. Spend 4 days on friendly matches. All of them at other secondary schools. One of the experiences that I found valuable was in Ang Mo Kio Secondary School.

As I was a reserved, (though I do play in quite a lot of matches :D) I helped out by refilling bottles, ball keeping and cheering. There was one time when I went to the canteen to fill the bottles of my friends, I realise that the two water coolers that I have found could not produce any water. I tried again and again but my efforts were completely futile. I then proceed to find someone who could help me out. I saw two school cleaners and went up to them saying, "Excuse me, the two water coolers there do not have water." (I know that its broken English) It seemed that I was either too soft or they did not know I was talking to them though there were only the three of us. I tried again louder this time and they indeed responded by looking at me, speechless. I figured after moments that they could not understand me as they were rather old and they were Chinese. I began to point to the water coolers and turning the bottles, that I am holding on, upside down to show that the water coolers could not produce water. For a moment, I thought that I was back in the era of cavemen body languages. The cleaners seemed to understand my frantic gestures better and walked towards me, leaving their job of washing the floor for a while. I tried to communicate with the auntie, whom I guess would be more friendly than the uncle, because of stereotype reasons. The auntie attempted to tell me using English that the water coolers have spoiled and the students did not told them about it. However, the English was mixed with Chinese and Hokkien Dialect, which I could understand only part of it. Furthermore, because of her lack of teeth(no offence) her pronunciation was rather inaccurate and I have severe problems understanding her. She seemed to know that I could not really understand her and she repeated what she wanted to communicate to me more than 3 times. As I was in a hurry in giving my thirsty mates their water and the match would be starting soon, I tried to thank her and be back on task without being too rude. Unfortunately, she could not sensed my urgency and tried to get me into a conversation by saying something about the students and them not telling her about the spoiled water coolers. I was in a dilemma as I really did not want to be rude or late back and she could not understand me when I told her I need to get back and passed the water bottles back to my friends, in chinese. In the end, I simply started to inch off little by little and continued smiling at her engaging in her conversation. I was glad she was so amiable and truly would like to stay and chat but my captain will surely fly into a rage at me for taking so long.

In conclusion, I learnt the importance of having a common language through a real life experience. Though in this case, its because the auntie was uneducated, but when I was to grow up and work in foreign countries, I will be like the auntie with my inferior and Singlish-English.

The Cat And The Moon by William Butler Yeats

The cat went here and there
And the moon spun round like a top,
And the nearest kin of the moon,
The creeping cat, looked up.
Black Minnaloushe stared at the moon,
For, wander and wail as he would,
The pure cold light in the sky
Troubled his animal blood.
Minnaloushe runs in the grass
Lifting his delicate feet.
Do you dance, Minnaloushe, do you dance?
When two close kindred meet.
What better than call a dance?
Maybe the moon may learn,
Tired of that courtly fashion,
A new dance turn.
Minnaloushe creeps through the grass
From moonlit place to place,
The sacred moon overhead
Has taken a new phase.
Does Minnaloushe know that his pupils
Will pass from change to change,
And that from round to crescent,
From crescent to round they range?
Minnaloushe creeps through the grass
Alone, important and wise,
And lifts to the changing moon
His changing eyes.

The personification used are in the line,"And the moon spun round like a top,"The author used this personification to perhaps show that the moon dances very elegantly. I am not very sure but I thought that the moon actually symbolise the eyes of the cat. The moon is still a moon but the eyes of the cat was like the changing phase of the moon.

I like this poem because I thought that the theme mysterious and complex. I especially liked the part where the poet asked Minnaloushe that if it knows that its pupils will change? The pupils could be the pupils of the eyes or pupils of Minnaloushe which was the moon. It may not be so complicated but it seem to be so. Thats probably why I choose this poem to share because I might get to know others perspective in this particular phrase.

Buddhists and Christians--A difference with similarity

I am going to share a story I have just read in Oriental Ghost Stories By Lafcadio Hearn. The title of the story is A Passional Karma. Let me briefly narrate the story to you all first. The author went to watch a play called 'Peony-Lantern'. The story of the Ghosts in the Romance of the Peony-Lantern is like this:

A young samurai named Hagiwara Shinzaburo went to visit O-Tsuyu, the daughter of a high-class samurai, with O-Tsuyu family physician. Shinzaburo was a unusually handsome and gentle lad and O-Tsuyu was as beautiful as a morning dew.(Tsuyu signifies Morning Dew) It was a love at first sight without the physician knowing and soon they have to part. At parting, O-Tsuyu whispered that if Shinzaburo was to not come and see her again, she will surely die.
The physician soon realised the relationship between the youths and decided to not bring Shinzaburo from seeing O-Tsuyu again. He was scared as O-Tsuyu's father has a reputation of cutting off heads. Soon after, the two love-sick youths became very sick and O-Tsuyu died. (With her servant O-Yone) Shinzaburo was grief-stricken and he placed a tablet with O-Tsuyu's name on it on his Buddhist shrine. O-Tsuyu and O-Yone came back to find him on the Festival of the Dead and bluff Shinzaburo that they are not dead and told him that its a horrible thing for people to tell him that they were dead. Shinzaburo and O-Tsuyu was very happy together and O-Tsuyu and O-Yone came back night after night. Tomozo, the servant of Shinzaburo, was afraid that his gentle master was duped by some cunning wanton and went to check on his master in his room late at night.

He was freaked out when he saw a being long dead. He ran all the way to Hakuodo Yusai, a person who could tell other people's fortunes by looking at the faces. The old man was very worried as the young man would die very soon if he was to be with a ghost. He managed to convince Shinzaburo to check out where O-Tsuyu and O-Yone said they were staying. Shinzaburo went and found out that instead of houses, he found tombs with O-Tsuyu and O-Yone names. Terror-stricken, he went to find the high-priest for help and the high-priest lent him a amulet and told him to chant a certain sutra every night in his house. He also ask him to paste holy-texts over every opening of his house. Night arrived and O-Tsuyu and O-Yone was not able to enter the house. Thus the undead went to haunt Tomozo threatening him if he dun peel off one of the holy-texts, he will know how hateful they can be. Tomozo's wife persuaded her husband to request for gold in return from taking away the amulet and the holy-texts. The ghosts managed to find gold and bribe Tomozo. Tomozo peel away the holy-texts and let the ghosts entered the room. Shinzaburo was found dead the next morning.

According to the author, Christians believed that they had only one human life to enjoy in this world and they would only be too glad to follow a dead sweetheart into the grave. However, in Buddhist thinking, they have millions of lives and the author think that he was selfish not to give up even one life for the sake of the girl who came back to him from the dead. In both religion's thinking, Shinzaburo was contemptible, cowardly and selfish. I am surprised and glad at the same time that the thinking of both religion is different yet similar in a righteous way.

Confessions of a Storybook Maniac

I still recalled that there was one time I read a book continuously for 3 hours. This could be counted as non-astonishing for some of you but to my mother, she was freakishly shocked. I still remember that that was in my Primary 6 schools holidays and I ate my lunch an hour late. I have forgotten the title of the book or else I would have recommended it to you all. :)

That was only one event that I have relate to you but there were times when I could not recover from the over-reading. I would not stop reading a book I really liked unless my mother stopped me or another event that caught my interest that was able to tear me away from the book. Hunger, thirst and fatigue are definitely not one of the factors if that book were to caught my interest. That was another time when my mother yelled at me to stopped reading and start revising my homework and I have no choice but to listen to her as her face was turning pale. (with anger) I stood up immediately and my eyes saw only colours of the rainbow and a overwhelming pain in my brain knocked me straight back onto my seat. The swirling of the rainbow's colours made me feel dizzy. That was the very first time I really considered taking note of the time I spend reading a book continuously.

However, I notice that time in secondary schools are limited. Naturally, I would spend lesser time to read. Even so, I would love to recommend the book 'Garden Spells' By Sarah Addison Allen to you all. It has some adult content but what I really wanted to share is the idea of the *country* that surface in my mind during my post of I Rather Be The City Rat Than The Country Rat. The scene where the story has mostly taken place was at a town in North Carolina. The town seemed to me as a part of a country rather than a part of a city because locals know the secrets of their neighbours. Also, in this little place, the surname mean something. Examples are the Waverley women, which are the main characters in the story. The Waverley women are always somehow touched by magic. There are also the Hopkin men who always married older women. Well, the country in my mind was like this where locals know secrets of their neighbours and generations of staying in the place has it meaning.

Is progress necessarily beneficial for society? Comment.

My stand is, progress is beneficial to the society. Before I slammed a whole chunk of words on you, let me share a hilarious thought. You would not be reading my post now on a flat screen if not for progress. Well, I liked to start with reminding you that the Computer was part of progress. :)

Let me just take the most recent event for example. Swine Flu. Without progress in medical knowledge we might not be able to produce medicine that could cure Swine flu. Without progress in basic hygiene knowledge we would not be able to decelerate the rapid spreading of Swine Flu. Without progress in technology, we might not be able to continue learning behind our computer screens if we were to be quarantined.

Just imagine if we were to be in the 1960s. The era when medical knowledge was not that advanced, personal hygiene was not always practiced and computers were not in Singapore yet. Could we fight Swine Flu that way?

On the other hand, because of progression, cars and air-conditioners were made. They cause pollution but its also because of progress that we created better cars and better air-conditioners which are more environmentally-friendly. Imagine cars were not created, we will be riding bicycles to work and school. The sick and injured would be lying down on a trishaw on their way to the A & E Unit. Ridiculous. Movie-goers exasperatingly fanning themselves while watching a movie. Haha. Elderly and young shivering while bathing without a water heater on a cold, rainy day.

I hope you all find my examples humorous but at the same time think about how progress is beneficial to the society.

The Book(s) that Made an Impact in My Parents' Lives

My father is reading "'The Master-Key To Riches' by Napoleon Hill. He feels that the book is very inspirational and the book is said to "form the success experiences of hundreds of the world's most powerful and wealthy men, will show you how to succeed in any walk of life".

He chooses books with titles that could give self-motivation. He thinks that reading for leisure could build up interest in reading and reading for work would somehow have some pressure. The book that has most impact on him is 'Think and Grow Rich.' He said that the book inspire him to work hard towards his objective.

The book that he deem the most enjoyable was 'Never Love a Stranger' by Harold Robbins. He read the book at the age of 18. He finds the book exceptionally enjoyable as he was at the peak of his puberty. According to Wikipedia, the book was said to be able to created controversy with its graphic sexuality and Ian Parker says that according to Robbins, publisher Pat Knopf bought Never Love a Stranger because "it was the first time he had ever read a book where on one page you'd have tears and on the next page you'd have a hard-on."

If his shelf caught fire, he would grabbed 'Winning' by Jack Welch. He like Napoleon Hill's books the most because his books are always very inspirational and motivating. He reads his books whenever he is free. He encourages children to read Enid Blyton. He thinks that Enid Blyton's books are very adventurous and interesting. He thinks that reading is a good pastime and it improves his knowledge and made him a wise man. It also broadens one's perspective. He told me that the chinese have one saying, “书里自有黄金屋，书中自有缘如玉”. *Note that this saying has many variations.*

I rather be the city rat than the country rat. Comment.

Well, if I were to put it in a very organised layout, it will be the pros and cons of living in the country and the city.


Country
Pros:

I got to experience the wonders of the country! I always love camps and overnights in the wild. The feeling you get would be totally different. You could really feel your five senses activating, reacting to the different sights, sounds, smell, feel, and maybe taste! I would have really like the Secondary 1 camp if the number of people could be reduce and perhaps the attitude of the trainers and my friends would be more positive? This is my personal feeling that I have not voiced out till now. I would loved to see the picturesque scenery of the country and the weedy backyard of my cottage. (If I could have mine.) I would loved to hear the cheerful chirps of the birds and the incessant buzz of bugs. I would loved to smell the sweet aroma of fresh-baked homemade bread and the damp earth in the morning. I would loved to stroke my own marmalade-coloured pussy on my lap when I got home (I loved kittens!) and the rough texture of my home's ancient stone walls. (Which I hope that's what my cottage was made of.) I would also loved to taste my own papaya grown from my papaya tree in my backyard. Of course, all of the wishes seemed very far-fetched and countryside was depicted like some paradise in the Garden of Eden. However, this would be true if I were to worked hard.

Living in the country would prove to be a boost for my health because I could escape from the deathly fumes released from the factories. Well, Singapore certainly do not have very polluted air. However, a breath of fresh morning air a day, keeps drowsiness far far away!

Cons:

Access to electricity and having high-tech appliances could proved to be more challenging in the countryside. Furthermore, if I were to rear poultry and cultivate crops, the effort needed to do the chores would no doubt be extremely tiring and the capital needed would not be very small. Access to transport will also be difficult in the countryside. Literacy level may be lower than urbanites. Medical services may not be that available too?Hmm...I suppose that's all? I could not think of anymore already. Please comment to let me know more cons of the countryside.


City
Pros:

I can have very high-tech appliances and a very convenient lifestyle. Examples of very high-tech appliances that perhaps cannot be found in the countryside would be the deem-to-be-indispensable air-conditioner. How many homes in Singapore owned a air-conditioner? And how many homes in Singapore owned more than one air-conditioner? I doubted countryside houses would be filled with air-conditioners like ours. A lot of people deemed air-conditioner as a very necessary and important appliance at home. I cannot denied it being important as it brings comfort though I use my air-conditioner once in a blue moon. :)
The transport in the city were very efficient and convenient. The food in the city are very health-wise too. The medical services should be rather available.

Cons:

Most cities has polluted air that can caused many undesirable illness. The cost of living would be very expensive too. Living in the city can be very stressful and pressurizing. The population could be quite dense.

In the end, I considered very long and I went to read Joshua Hia's, Si Hao's and Zheyi's blog. Then I realise one thing that was different from one another's blog post. The city would mostly be compared to as Singapore or Bombay and the countryside/country would most likely be compared to as the village Thul or some other countries with scenarios like storybooks description about countryside/country. Finally, I realised I have not much of a stand but if the scenario were to be Thul Vs Bombay, I would choose Bombay because it would be much more practical. However, if it were to be *The Peaceful Country* Vs Singapore, I would choose *The Peaceful Country*, as it has always be my dream to experience country life.